Differences: Outlines
by LeonaJay
Summary: Part 2 of the Differences Series. Sometimes you have to see behind the lines to see the true picture. With Alfred and Matthew, that's it. Nobody ever see's Matthew there, and if they do, they abuse him, Well, that's until an albino with a dark past helps him when he's about to give up on everything...PruCan side of the story, other pairings involved. Rated T- Warnings in Chapter 1.
1. Chapter 1

**Thanks for clicking on my story! This is Part 2 of a Series- The Differences Series, but reading Differences: Childhood isn't compulsory, only if you want to read it and preferable like FrUK.**

**Warnings for the Whole Story: Character Deaths, Self-Harming, Near-Rape, Homosexuality and Homophobia, and several others. To sum it up: You have to be mature and serious to read this. There will be some comedy at times, but not as much as there is serious topics.**

The blonde haired woman smiled softly as her three year old son scrambled into her arms. Her precious chid, Gilbert Amery Beilschmidt. The young boy was a spitting image of his father, a patriotic German soldier who had sadly passed away just a couple of days ago fighting for his country.

Gilbert had all of his father's looks, none of his mother's bar her soft skin, including his enchanting crimson red eyes, his platinum blond- slowly turning white- mop of hair and albinism, but she wouldn't change him for anything. He was perfect in her eyes.

Heidi Beilschmidt, despite losing her husband, was a happy woman, living with her father who she adored, the silent serious Amery Germania (whom Gilbert's middle name had come from), in an out of the way house in the English Countryside, although all of them were German through and through, with strong ancestry from Prussia. There was only one other house connecting theirs, and bar Gilbert and their daughter Elizabeta, neither household bothered with each other. Elizabeta, who originally came from Hungary, was only a couple of months younger than Gilbert, and she was mature for her age.

Amery had found friendship with Romulus Vargas as a child, a slightly dopey Italian with a talent in art, design and cooking. He was now a top designer, living in the heart of Rome, where he had grown up before the two both went to a college in Austria. No-one had a clue how the silent, serious German and the crazy, wild Italian got on (Amery wondered himself sometimes), but they somehow did. Amery did consider strangling him near enough every day, and sometimes even attempted to do so. Romulus however never freaked out or even flinched, the German always wanted to know how.

Romulus was now living happily with two fully grown daughter of his own, who had long moved out. Jeanne, the eldest, was married to a Frenchman and now had a son, Francis, whom Heidi had only seen pictures of. Recently though, Pascal, Jeanne's husband, had been struck with a rare cancer and would probably only survive to around his son's fifth or sixth birthday. Francis was already two, nearing three, Gilbert only being just under five months older than him.

Maria, the younger, seemed a suspicious type, though nobody knew if it was just her personality or there was a reason. She had one son, born somewhere in between Francis and Gilbert called Lovino, and she was pregnant with another.

Heidi snapped out of her daze as she saw two pale-skinned feet nearly, the body they were attached to trying to escape and make a dive for the floor. She grabbed her son by the ankles, the younger yelping, writhing around a bit and eventually giving in.

"Gilly." She started, using his pet name as she used her hand to stroke through his platinum blond hair. Gilbert stuck his tongue out, he hated his nickname! "I have something important to tell you."

"What?" He said irritably, looking into his mother's eyes because he knew if he didn't she'd say he wasn't listening to him. His German accent could be heard around his childish lisp, and he was already learning German on top of English.

"How would you feel if you were going to have a little bruder in a couple of months' time?" She said, a smile on her face. Gilbert had been saying a lot, especially more recently he wanted a little sibling, especially a brother.

Two red eyes widened, looking her straight in the eye for a few seconds, before everything came out at once. "What's his name going to be? When's he going to be born? Is he going to be as awesome as me? Wait, that's impossible! He'll have to be the second most awesome?"

"I was thinking of giving him a nice German name." Heidi mused, ignoring the last part of her son's questions, but she couldn't help but giggle softly at them. "He'll be born sometime at the end of April or the beginning of May."

"But that's ages away! It's only February! Can't he be born sooner?"

"I've known since November, how do you think I feel? Did you think a baby just pops out straight away? It's got to grow inside my tummy, it takes nine months. If he was born now, he'd be small and unhealthy and you wouldn't be able to play with him."

"But that's not awesome! Romulus told me that Mumie's can buy seeds from a baby shop, eat it and then out pops a baby!"

"Well, you'll have to find out when you get older." Heidi knew she shouldn't mention how a baby was actually born, let alone conceived. A three year old didn't need to know that!

Heidi started rubbing her stomach softly. Luckily, Gilbert usually sat at the side of her or on the end of her lap, so her unborn child wouldn't be squashed by his brother already before even seeing him. Feeling a kick at the action, she grabbed her son's hand and placed it where she had been kicked. "Can you feel anything?"

Gilbert shook his head, his hair flailing wildly, but once the baby kicked again, he nodded.

"He kicked your belly!"

She nodded. "All babies do it. He kicks stronger than you did."

"You're lying to me!"

"Nein. The doctor said so as well. And it's fibbing, not lying."

"You're still fibbing." He muttered, before brightening up. "I'm going to be the most awesome big bruder you have ever seen!"

"I know you will Gilly. No-one can be such an 'awesome' big brother as you."

~x~

If you ever met Amery Germania, you'd realise that he like to grumble. A lot.

He was grumbling now, but with good reason. Since baby Beilschmidt was to enter the world within the next twenty four hours, he was worrying over his daughter, as well as an albino almost jumping off the walls in excitement, and he had nothing else to do with him since he was already gone and told Elizabeta.

Amery kept one on the mischievous boy, currently watching some of the fish in their fish tank, his nose right up against the glass, and the other one of the phone. A friend of his, a midwife, had promised to call him as soon as the baby was born. Heidi had been complaining of back pains for most of the morning, and soon after, her waters broke.

Amery had wanted to go with her, since her husband nor her mother was present due to her passing away suddenly before Gilbert was born, but she asked for him to stay with Gilbert, and he couldn't say no to that, despite knowing the child would be so excited.

"Can you stop being so energetic for five seconds and go and find something on the television?"

"Nein!" Sometimes it was so tempting to strangle his grandson. And now was one of those times.

Bri-

"Hallo?"

"Congratulations, he's beautiful Amery! He's definitely got your look."

Amery sighed with relief, but after a couple of seconds he realised that there was a tense aura on the other side of the phone. "Is something the matter?"

"I'm so sorry Amery. There were…complications, we- we couldn't save your daughter."

That second broke everything, including Amery's heart. First Armen in January, now Heidi, exactly three months after. How was he going to break the news to Gilbert?

"D-did-" Amery's voice broke and he was almost crying. But he couldn't let Gilbert see him. "Did Heidi name him before she-?"

"Yes, she did. He's called Ludwig Alan. Though she didn't know whether he should have her surname or his fathers."

"Let me get my other grandson sorted, I'll come to pick him up now."

"Thank you. And Amery?"

"Yes?"

"I know how much losing a child breaks your heart. But you've got her children to think about, they're orphans at a young age and they'll need you now that they don't have their parents. Make sure they love you and you act like the father that Gilbert hardly, and Ludwig never had."

"I-I will. Thank you."

~x~ THREE YEARS LATER ~x~

"Gilbert, stop kicking me! You're hurting my shin!"

"I wasn't kicking you in the first place!"

"Could you two stop arguing until at least when the meal ends?! I don't care what happens after, but I want my meal in peace!"

"He started it though!"

"No, you did! Stop trying to get on opa's good side!"

"Gilbert Amery and Ludwig Alan Beilschmidt! You're purposely trying to annoy me, aren't you? And Gilbert, when you're both like this, neither of you are on my good side!"

"Nein, I'm sorry opa, I won't do it again."

"Ja, obviously."

Daggers were shot at Gilbert from both his Grandfather and his younger brother. The three of them sat quietly around the dinner table on the cold night in late January, picking at and eating parts of their food.

That was when the doorbell was rung.

"Nobody ever comes around here, especially during winter. And it can't be the Hérdévary's, Daniel rings twice and Elizabeta knocks." Amery muttered to himself as he excused himself from the table to answer it.

As soon as Amery left the dining room to answer the doorbell in the hallway, Gilbert and Ludwig gave each other the stare. "It's your fault I got into trouble."

Ludwig gave his brother a cold stare. "You learnt that off opa." Gilbert remarked, and it wasn't the sort of reaction Ludwig wanted, the younger staring for a couple more seconds, before shrugging and going back to his dinner.

"I hate the fact that I'm always the one who-"

BANG.

"What was that?!" Gilbert said, racing for the door.

Just before he went to open it, he heard it get locked from the other side. "Was?!"

He knew there was no chance of it opening, so he turned around to look for his brother. The younger German was nowhere to be seen.

"Shizer." Gilbert cursed, though he only did so because Amery had gone to using it a lot recently, so he had picked it up. "Ludwig, where are you?!"

The younger appeared from under the table, as curious from the noise as the elder but even more shaken up.

The door unlocked and a man walked in, a pistol in each hand, aiming both at the two boys.

Ludwig screamed.

"Get out of here and never come back and your lives will be spared. If you _ever _return, feel free to join the rest of your family in the graveyard."

Gilbert felt a cold sweat cover his forehead.

"Hurry up you two little shits! If we killed two kids for no reason, we'd be as sure as dead as well. You'll have to climb that fence of yours in the back."

_We can't climb that! I might have a chance to but Ludwig never will! Come on Gilbert, you can't let Ludwig see you like this, you've got to think of an awesome idea!_

"I've got a better idea!" He suddenly braced himself. If he was an adult, he'd probably already be dead.

"Ohoho, have you you little brat? Go on, show me."

_I can't let Eliza and her Dad get involved or they might get shot as well! We'll have to go through the forest and try and find a way out!"_

"But first, where's my opa?"

"Sorry kid, but you won't be seeing your opa for a long time. If you want to, then I suggest staying there."

"Nein, I've got a life to live first!"

Gilbert was surprisingly mature when he needed to be, so quickly grabbed Ludwig's hand, before racing for the stairs. Luckily for them, Amery had redesigned the house so the staircase was no longer in the hallway, so they could get up them. In the background, both heard a vehicle drive off, but refused to look back.

Due to Ludwig's height disadvantage, Gilbert could run up them while he still had to scramble. Gilbert was already standing in the doorframe of Amery's bedroom once he reached the top, the one closest to the fence.

"You have to climb out of the window, Ludwig."

"But I'll fall!"

"Ludwig, it's do it or die. I'll follow you straight after, I promise."

The younger shook slightly, still traumatised, but after taking one final look at the drop, he eventually climbed out of the window and onto the windowsill. Since he was only nearing three, he didn't have much trouble with his small feet. Gilbert struggled at first, but once he got used to it, he was fine. The six year old was holding the maturity of an adult at this point, trying to look for anywhere, _anywhere _he could push Ludwig off and then jump and they'd both be safe.

"Ludwig! Gilbert!"

The two looked around to the Hérdévary house, where Daniel, the single father of Elizabeta, was yelling at them.

"Hold on! I'll come around and grab you!"

The Hungarian obviously knew what was going on, and using his back gate (Gilbert wished they had one now), he ran around to the outside of their fence.

"I'll grab you! I promise I won't let you fall! If I saw my Eliza fall to her death, I'd never cope, and I can't let you two end up the same way!"

Gilbert knew Daniel wouldn't lie to them like that, so before Ludwig could react, he felt himself falling. He yelled, almost screaming in shock, before he felt him slam into the Hungarian man, almost sending them both flying into a tree, where a forest surrounded them. Once he calmed down, Daniel let Ludwig down, and after staggering a few paces, the contents of Ludwig's dinner were now all over a bush.

Once Daniel's arms were out again for Gilbert, the albino braced himself and after a couple of seconds, he jumped.

He knew now how Ludwig felt. Falling from a second story floor at an awkward angle, with so many dangerous things he could have misjudged and slammed into, his life going with it.

He felt himself slam into hard bone, and he knew then his life wouldn't end just yet.

"I'm so sorry boys, but I can't stay with you. I knew this was going to happen, so I got you both a backpack each. They have warm clothes, food and I managed to squeeze a tent in, but unfortunately only sleeping mats and not bags. You'll have to walk through the forest."

"If it means keeping mein bruder safe, I don't care."

"You're such a lovely boy, Gilbert." Daniel smiled. "Now, I don't know about anyone else, but near the other side of the forest lives a man named Vash Zwingli with his sister Lili. He's a bit tight with his money but loves children so you shouldn't have too many problems with him. If you don't find him, I wish you the best of luck and if you somehow find contact with me or Elizabeta in the future, contact us. I'm so sorry about all you've been through, and I'm just going to tell you once you make it through this forest, you will be fine and a new life will happen."

"Danke." Gilbert breathed, taking his own backpack as well as Ludwig's, who was just recovering over his vomiting and was about ready to get going as well. Once the two turned, ready to leave, he also let out a soft "Auf Wiedersehen…" As the two German boys walked into the forest, unsure of what was going to happen to them both next.


	2. Chapter 2

**This is in no shape of form meant to upset or offend anyone. I know homosexuals, homophobes, cutters, people being severely bullied and afraid to admit it, and people with unstable parents personally and I know how it can affect people. If you happen to be one, feel free to PM me if you would like to talk, or if you want links for support websites.**

**I'm never usually up past 11P.M. because I'm an early to bed early to rise person, it's now 00:22, feel happy. Also, this is only my second Chapter to reach 5000 words.**

"_I find it so harsh that someone could do that to a child. First they kill their only alive relative, and then they go onto threatening them if they come back to the house ever again, they'll be killed! Constable Jones, do you know anything that's happened to the two boys?"_

"_We managed to speak to their neighbour-"_

"_Mattie, look, Daddy's on TV!"_

"_I know Alfred. Mommy's watching it so be quiet!"_

"_-So if you happen to see either of these boys, though they'll most likely be together, please call the Police and try and coax them into coming with you. They are probably very sensitive after the event, so it will probably be pretty hard."_

"_Poor poor boys." Madeline Williams, the mother of Alfred Jones and Matthew Williams, picked her twin sons up and placed them on her lap. Matthew leaned back against her chest while Alfred struggled for a bit, before finally settling down._

"_Why is Daddy on the news Mommy?"_

"_Two little boys have gone missing because their Granddad died suddenly and they had to leave the house."_

"_Why?"_

"_You're too young to understand why, Alfred."_

"_But I'm six! Why can't I understand?"_

"_Because it's adult talk. If you happen to find them, then ask them, but I'm not telling you anything until you're at least sixteen."_

I always has an interest in the Gilbert and Ludwig Beilschmidt case, even after they were found half a week later. I don't know what I found so interesting about it, probably that Gilbert was my age. Or since Gilbert was an albino I remembered him more when I thought about the cases that I'd found out about.

Dad didn't mind me and Alfred looking at his case files, as long as we just kept it between us and nobody else. Since they were older and the case was solved by the time he finally let us look at them, he actually let me keep the Gilbert and Ludwig Beilschmidt case file since he noticed my interest in it, as long as I gave it back to him if he needed to take it into work. After he was attacked by a dog and he couldn't work as a full time Police Officer, he let me keep it permanently.

It was seven years since they had disappeared and had been found. And three weeks since both brothers had been told they could go into a normal school instead of one where they were closely watched in case they mentally snapped. Seven years seemed a bit extreme, especially for Ludwig since he probably doesn't remember much at all, but despite taking an interest in Dad's work, I wasn't an expert so I couldn't say anything. And as well as it being a normal school, they were moved to Hetalia, my hometown, when they were rehomed, and the two would be going to the same school as Alfred and I did.

I kind of felt sorry for them because of it.

Grange wasn't a bad school because of the teaching or the supplies, it was what the students did without the teachers looking. Like the one where the first student in the year group to be found out gay (It was an all boy's school) would be beaten just for being the 'first one'. Even if others admitted their homosexuality, they'd be fine since they weren't the 'first one'. Unfortunately for me, I was the 'first one' for our year.

A few others joined in, but Carlos and Sadiq were the worst. Sadiq was extremely homophobic, and Carlos…he was near enough the same as everyone else was.

For those of you who have siblings of the same gender about eighteen months maximum age difference and you happen to look alike, don't you get annoyed when people mistake you for your sibling? Mom is the only one who doesn't do it, Dad even does it sometimes. What's worse is if both of us are there, then they will acknowledge Alfred and treat me like I'm a ghost haunting them. Other than Alfred and Dad, nobody would apologise about doing so.

"Alfred, wake up."

I hated having to do it, but Mom had asked me to wake Alfred up, like I did so every other day. He usually ignored me until I literally dragged him out of bed, and sometimes hit me in his semi-conscious form. He was pretty slow so it was easy to see when it was coming, but if you didn't dodge him, he was pretty strong. One time he had dragged me along to hang out with his friends, they decided to play dares and one of his friends dared him to hit on two pretty obese girls watching us and pick them up and swing them around. He did it as if they were anorexic even though they were probably about 95th percentile, and it wasn't because they were muscular.

"No. I'm tired." Alfred retreated back under the covers of his bed, moaning since I had put every light in his room on. I knew he was wide awake, but he was just doing it to annoy me.

"We've got summer off after today, Alfred. You have six weeks to catch up on your sleep then."

"What if I'm tired now?"

"We won't do any lessons today, we'll just have assemblies."

"No lessons, so I can stay at home and sl-"

"Just get out. Dad will kill you if you don't."

"Good point, Dad is shit scary." He said, throwing his legs out of the bed and drearily appearing from under the covers. "Is there any food ready?"

"No, make it yourself."

"Aww, but Mom makes yours and-"

"Because I don't get someone else to wake me up and I wake up at an early enough time to eat something decent. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day as well, because it's break_fast."_

"I don't need a fucking lecture off my younger twin." He said grumbling, grabbing for his shirt. "Why can't we go and live in America, we get to wear our own clothes and people won't keep calling me fat, lazy and arrogant."

"You are though."

"_Thanks_, bro." Alfred spat slightly. He didn't mean it, I knew that, but he was quite a good actor.

I went downstairs to sit in the living room, the television as background noise showing that where we lived was going to catch the end of a storm passing through from France to Nordic Europe. I didn't mind storms, but Dad and Alfred hated them so they kept me and Mom up all night. I decided to get my book to read, since it was nearly finished and if I wasn't distracted, Alfred's timing would be that I finish the page when he is on the sixth step down. In the end, it was shut quietly when he was on the eighth step, having finished two steps before.

"Mom!" Alfred whined. Mom was sewing up a patch on Alfred's second pair of school trousers in the dining room, since they would still fit him next year. "The shower was cold!"

"The hot water probably just turned off just before you got in, honey. You'll just have to wake up earlier for the next school year so it's still warm when you get in."

"Can't you just all get up later?"

"No, Alfred."

Alfred whined slightly before throwing himself on the settee. "All that's going to happen today is that we're going to have awards assemblies and get told to be safe during summer. We get the same lecture every year and I won't win anything so there's no point."

"You're the Captain of the football team and you won that Swimming Competition so you may get awards for those."

"They can wait for six weeks. I have no space for them anyway so they'll just get lost or broken. You think you'll get anything?"

"Probably not."

"You may get an award for English, that day you weren't here just after we finished our mini-novels, the teacher wouldn't shut up about you."

"Probably because I learnt English and French at the same time so I'm not as fluent."

"Nah, it wasn't that. And you know she rarely gives compliments."

"She just doesn't like most of the class."

"Boys, you two will have to get going in a minute, you always leave on twenty past and its seventeen minutes past."

"OK, mom."

"Sure thing Mom! Now where the hell did I put my bag?"

"It's by the door, where I usually put both of them when I come downstairs…" I said.

"Thanks man." He said, throwing his nearly destroyed back onto his back. Since the school refused to get goalposts for the tarmac area and the ones on the school field were for Physical Education, Extra-Curriculum and people who paid only, the ones who wanted to play football used their bags as goalposts. Mine was only just breaking at parts because I carried so many things, but Alfred's had been clinging on for dear life for quite a while.

"We're going now Mom!" Alfred yelled, leaning into the dining room. "We'll be back an hour and a half early since they don't like us when we're hyper and are kicking us out early."

"OK boys, see you then."

"Bye Mom." I said quietly, leaning around the doorframe as well. She probably didn't hear me though, since Alfred said the same thing and his voice was considerably louder than mine. When I yelled, it just about matched his normal talking.

The two of us left the house and slowly walked to school. We probably lived only a couple of hundred metres away from the school, but we got here early because Alfred usually went and had a small match and I…got the beating over and done with without being late for lessons.

I had a habit of speeding up when we walked to school, so Alfred didn't see anything. He didn't know anything about the beating, bar I was 'the first one'. He didn't know the consequences of being 'the first one' and unless Carlos accidentally got us messed up and told him, then he wouldn't know. I wouldn't make him worry. He didn't need to.

No sooner as I walked the car park, Sadiq had grabbed the collar of my shirt and yanked me so I was at his eye level (This made me sound considerably shorter than him, but I was probably about an inch taller than him at the least). "_Hey_, Williams. Come nice and early to see me? How sweet."

I vaguely remembered what he did to me, but I do remember that he decided to shove my head down the toilet and flush it several times, making it sound clogged so nobody came in looking suspicious. Since nobody would be in there too early, he then dragged me into hairdressing and dried it slightly so it looked like it was still drying from the shower. Sadiq acted dumb, but he was quite good at planning things out.

When he dragged me for part two of 'the punishment', Carlos arrived.

"How's it going Alfred?"

Sadiq never said anything about me being Matthew and that you could see Alfred fist pumping someone right at that moment. He knew that the Cuban would stop and would probably tell someone if it was me. He _did _like me, but I think he had dodgy eyesight or something. Alfred and I weren't identical twins, but we looked more similar than non-identical twins usually do. The giveaways were our hairstyles, our eye colour and I had slightly softer features than him. From my hockey and his football and swimming, we both had some muscle, but mine wasn't as obvious, since I was solid but not defined. It made me look a bit fat, but I wasn't bothered. They never mentioned that anyway.

Nobody ever went by where the French block used to be before it was moved since no other classes had replaced it yet. Sadiq usually dragged me, but since I just went willingly, he didn't for once. It felt weird because I was so used to my collar scratching the back of my neck, but it would be nice if he let me walk normally more often. Mom was a bit surprised that my collar was nearly destroyed within a week school started. Luckily, she wasn't the sort of person to pry and she was good with needle and thread.

They spent until the warning bell pinning me to the floor so they could kick me wherever they wanted and however hard they felt like doing so. Unfortunately, I had to keep my jumper on at all times so nobody could see the bruises, and since there's currently a heat wave and our jumpers had to be black, I would probably end up boiling hot for the whole day.

The two left separate ways to go to their own classrooms. Luckily, since there were three different form groups for our year, we were all in different ones so they couldn't plot together and one of them couldn't pick on me. Sadiq shared most of my classes but the ones he did share were the ones that had strict teachers so I could get off a bit lighter for that.

Registration was fine. Most of the boys in my class were also gay so they accepted the fact I was 'the first one' and some even sympathised with it. The teacher didn't know about it, so she didn't say anything. What I was regretting was next lesson. It was Science, and Carlos was in the lesson as well as Sadiq. And the teacher had decided to put all three of us on a table with Francis Bonnefoy.

I got on fine with Francis, I'd known him since he moved to Hetalia. He had a lot of problems before he came here with his parents, thus resulting his father's death and his mother in prison and I was the one the teacher had chosen to look after. We aren't as close as we used to be, but we're still friends, even though it's Francis looking out for me now rather than vice versa.

"Alright boys, since it's your last day and it's not as if you're going to do any work, I'm going to let you do a practical on your tables of four. It involves cold water, so since we're all men, I'm not sure it matters to any of you if you go shirtless while your jumpers and shirts will probably set fire easier than not dry."

Sadiq whispered something to Carlos, snickering slightly. Instead of listening to what the practical was, he decided to wet willy Heracles, the other person he liked annoying, as well as finding an elastic band off the floor and using it to tie the Greek's hair in a plait.

Each table was given a bucket of water while one person in the group went to get everything else. While Francis was gone, Carlos and Sadiq grinned at each other, though they tried to hide it.

"Since we have to pour this water into that big beaker that that weird Frenchman's getting, I'll hold the bucket since I'm the strongest."

Francis reappeared at the desk, hearing the whole thing. Ignoring the bit where they said he was weird, he simply said "Non, we don't pour it into the beaker until we've finished with it."

"I told you Carlos!" Sadiq acted. "Now pass me that bucket since you don't know what the hell you're doing with it!"

I could tell exactly what they were planning on doing.

"No, I just misheard the last bit! I'll do it!" The two of them were holding either end of it, both standing on my right, Carlos closer to me than Sadiq.

"Fine!" Sadiq let go of the bucket, and since he had been pulling so hard, Carlos ended up throwing the bucket back and soaking me.

"Mon Dieu, why would you do that to Mathieu?! You always bully him, what's the point of it?"

"He's 'the fi-" I didn't hear the rest of it, I walked out of the classroom, not caring what the teacher thought for once. I heard him ask Francis what I was doing, but before he even had to explain, he probably saw our empty bucket and the trail of drips I had left from where I was stood to the door. I was dripping for quite a long time.

I went straight to the toilets. The school wasn't big enough for more than one lot, but it was empty.

Luckily, it was water and not chemicals they threw at me. They'd probably throw the latter given the chance. They don't care I'm a living, breathing person, they just think I'll rot in hell. Sadiq does, anyway.

I shut the bathroom door and took off both my jumper and shirt. My trousers were wet as well, but they'd dry soon enough.

Turning on the hand dryer and drying the clothes for about five minutes under them (they were dry now surprisingly, but they were too hot to put on yet), the door opened. I expected it to be one of the teachers, but it was Francis.

"Mathieu, Sir told me to come and look for you- Mathieu!"

He had the perfect view of my scars from where he was standing, the majority at his angle being the worse ones.

"Mathieu, what happened?"

I didn't say a word, too shocked to say anything, holding my tears in.

"Mathieu…"

I made a sort of strangled noise, before burying my face into Francis' jumper, sobbing. I didn't care if he saw me, I didn't care if anyone heard me, as long as three people didn't. Carlos, Sadiq and Alfred. If any of those three heard, I don't know what I'd do.

Francis sighed slightly and hummed as he wrapped his arm around me in a comforting way, his other arm slowly stroking my hair. I didn't mind it, it just felt a little…awkward.

"Mathieu, tell me what happened."

"I'm 'the first one'." I said softly, not giving him any eye contact.

"Mathieu, look at me." I didn't at first, but when he repeated it, I slowly did. "I don't see what the point of this 'first one' thing is, but it's stupid. Why should you abused for being homosexual just because you were the first one to come out with it? Lots of us are."

I gasped slightly from the crying. "You are too?"

"I'm bisexual swinging more towards homosexual."

"Oh…" I said, sniffing slightly to try and stop the tears. Unfortunately for me, once I start, they don't stop.

"Mathieu, you should go and meet Ivan. I think it would help you out a lot."

"Ivan works at the school?" I knew Ivan out of school, he was a tall, slightly scary and sadistic looking Russian with three adoptive sons and two sisters who live with him.

"Oui, he is the Councillor."

"…I'll go and see him then."

"Would you like me to come too or just tell Sir that you won't be in for the rest of the lesson and Miss in English if you end up being that long?"

"Could you tell them please?"

"Oui, that's fine." Francis said, before lowering his voice. "Mathieu, why do you let them do this to you?"

"Because they treat me even worse if I don't let them do it and…and I'm too scared to tell anyone."

"You shouldn't be afraid to tell anyone that you're being abused, especially when it has this effect on you. You shouldn't be abused at all, let alone so bad that you are covered in bruises and scars, and as soon as I come in you burst into tears because you're too scared to let anyone know."

I stayed silent, looking away from him.

"Mathieu, do you want me to walk to Ivan's room with you or would you like to go on your own?"

"Um, could you come with me please?"

"Oui, sure."

The toilets were near enough right next to the Councillors office, so Francis really didn't need to come. Outside his door were three chairs, two occupied, one not.

"Even though we're in different forms I'll ask our tutors if we can sit together during assembly." Francis started. "I promise you I won't tell a soul what happened and one of the teachers wanted you."

"Merci." I said softly as he walked off, sticking his hand up slightly as he departed.

The other two chairs were taken by Toris and Eduard, the elder two of Ivan's three sons. I knew Eduard slightly better than Toris since he was only a year older than me while Toris was two, but I wasn't close to either of them. I just happened to see them around the school.

"Matthew Williams, younger twin of Alfred F. Jones, turned thirteen two weeks ago, bilingual and in Lancaster form. And unfortunately, 'the first one'." Eduard was the one who had control over all the folders with student's private information since he had Ivan at his house to make sure he wasn't using it for personal advantage. Either he remembered things very easily, or Ivan didn't care what he did and didn't know.

"O-oui, that's me."

"Eduard you're probably really freaking him out!" Toris said. He was quite jumpy and freaked out pretty easily himself. He was one of the first people in his year to admit he was homosexual, but his boyfriend, Feliks, was the 'first one'. Luckily, people were either accepting of his sexuality or found him too weird to pick on, so he was left alone.

"I'm guessing you're here to see Ivan?" Not even three year old Raivis referred to Ivan as 'Dad' or папа or anything like that. From what I'd heard, he had taken all their money put in savings bonds and had taken the majority for himself. He seemed pretty horrible, but if he was any use, I'd be seeing him for quite some time at this rate.

"So why are you here, Matthew?" Eduard asked.

"…" I didn't know whether to tell them, especially Eduard since he had the folders.

"You don't have to tell us, Matthew!" Toris said, smiling awkwardly.

"I'm t-trying to resolve what's happening to me because of being 'the first one'…"

Toris put his hand on my shoulder. "They should learn to accept your sexuality. England is one of the countries that supports it and they've just given lots more rights to gay people, such as they're now allowed to get married in a Church if the Church permits it. If they should pick on any homosexual, it should be the horrible ones, and you're definitely not horrible Matthew."

"Merci." I said softly.

"Toris, you can be such a sweet boy, I've raised you well, da?"

"D-d-da!" As soon as he realised that Ivan had heard his mini-speech he went straight into a stutter.

"And I was just thinking that you'd finally got over that stutter of yours. Are you and Eduard here for a reason?"

"I-I was a-asked to d-do something by my t-teacher and this is the o-only place that I can a-access the Wi-Fi!" Eduard said, going into the same stutter Toris had.

"I-I'd been asked to h-help Eduard!"

"You two boys should really be in lessons, and you will be when I take control of the school, there'll be no leaving early and assemblies will be after school instead of wasting lesson time." So _this _is sadist Ivan. "Matvey, have you been asked to help my boys-" I could literally feel both of them shudder when he said that. "-or are you here to see me?"

"I'm here to see you…"

"Lovely! It's nice to see a nice face instead of a drug addict who's got his girlfriend pregnant and they're only fifteen for once! Feel free to take any chair in my office!" He said, stepping aside and letting me walk into the room.

Ivan's office wasn't the sort of place I'd like to have myself, but it suited what I thought of him. It was just like any other plain office, bar it had small things that were dead giveaways of his nationality (Russian Dolls, Russian Flags, pictures of Moscow and some other place I'd not heard of called Ulan-Ude…) and pictures of his three 'boys' and his sisters. Once seemed nice from the looks of them, but the other looked like she was about to claw someone's eyes out.

"So, Matvey, I'm not here to make assumptions, but from what Toris said, I'm thinking this may involve something to do with…your sexuality?"

"Oui, it is…sorry if this is just a waste of your time."

"Matvey, if you feel as if you need to be here, then you're welcome here. I don't turn anyone down from coming to see me if they feel the need they do. I've sorted out girls who have had their first time of the month before and they didn't care that I didn't really want to know!"

Despite hearing the bad things I had about Ivan, I kind of felt reassured already by his personality, even though every so often his comments were slightly…sadistic.

"I've got some leaflets that have just the sort of information you need Matvey. But they're in my car so I'll be gone for a couple of minutes to go and get them. If anyone knocks on my door, just tell them I'll be back and they can wait outside until I come back. Don't break any of my things!"

The last part sounded like a joke, but I really didn't want to know what would happen if I broke any of his things. Bar one that had caught my eyes.

I wasn't the sort of person to randomly go looking in people's private property, but I found myself diving through Ivan's desk drawers. There wasn't anything too bad in there bar a magazine in Russian that looked like porn but I founded what I wanted.

The screwdriver was a little small for my hands, but it was easy enough to unscrew the blade of my pencil sharpener.

Did I really need to resort to this? Did I really need to stick the blade into my flesh and slice along it to create a deep red mark and watch blood slowly seep out of it, or make it quicker if I dug it in a little deeper? Did I have to become a cutter just to make myself feel better?

Yes I did.

I only tried three cuts today. One was the lightest I could do so, the second was my average strength, and one was as hard as I could. That one really hurt and I cussed under my breath.

I quickly threw the still separated pencil sharpener into my pencil case and the screwdriver into its original drawer before Ivan could catch me. I actually had good luck on my side for once, and he came in about three seconds after I got back into my seat comfortably.

"Sorry I took so long Matvey, there was a cat under my car and it took forever for it to meet its fate~"

"It's OK." I said, smiling innocently. I felt sorry for the cat.

"Here's the leaflets!" He said, handing three over. "The first one's for people who are homosexual and are close to people who don't accept it. It's mostly for siblings and parents, but I've given it to two other students and it's worked for them, so it should for you. The second one is for people being abused and how to cope and seek help. The third is a few contacts I thought you might find useful, my own number is the bottom one. If you want to use my phone, then feel free, but I'll have to leave the room since break time is coming up and I have to be on duty."

"Wait, I've been here at least an hour then?!" I said loudly, well, loudly for me anyway. It was probably around a normal person talking level for anyone else.

"Mmhmm, you were probably out there for twenty or so minutes since you and Toris were having such a deep conversation, and have been in here for forty five. Toris seemed to help you two a bit, so if you want me to add the home phone number he usually picks up, just ask and I'll add it on!"

"OK, then…yes please."

"Matvey, you don't seem convinced. Do you want to stand with me at break time?"

"No thanks, I'll be fine. Can I use the phone please?"

"I gave you the offer Matvey, you don't have to ask! I'll lock you in so nobody else comes in, just call my mobile if you want to come out before I come back!"

"OK…" I said as he left the room, the sound of the door locking a couple of seconds later.

I didn't use the phone, I just watched everyone outside. I even saw Sadiq and Carlos, and it looked like they were trying to find me.

I nearly went back for the pencil sharpener, but I didn't. Three cuts was enough for the first day. Bar the deep one, they weren't that obvious, and I could just say I cut myself by accident in Food Technology, since Mom didn't care about my timetable and Dad didn't ask. Alfred…I'd think of something during assembly.

And do you know what the most disturbing part was?

That sharpener would be used a lot in the future, and it wouldn't be for its purpose- sharpening pencils- once.


	3. Chapter 3

**School is not cool. Also, my keyboard suddenly turned Belgian/Dutch layout and I didn't notice, so sorry for any spelling errors in the first thousand words or so. **

**Warning: Mention of Near Rape up ahead, not in detail. **

The unawesome events after mein opa was murdered were…interesting.

Vash Zwingli wasn't the man who took us in, it was his father, Ervino. Despite Vash only being my age when we first met, and he had a strong like for everyone bar his little sister, we went through a lot since the time we met.

Surprisingly, it only took us a day to make it through the large forest, still covered in a light layer of snow, and to find the Swiss-Liechtensteiner family on the other end. I remember the relief we both felt as we saw the farm on top of Retchscott hill as if it were yesterday. I remember the Mountain Goat that came to sniff us, the building reach closer and closer to us, and the two children staring at us as if we were another species.

"Big Brother…" Lili said softly. She was a sweet girl, Ludwig's age and she was so polite and kind to the both of us. "Shall I get Vati?"

"We don't need Vati, Lili! They're only about the same age as we are and it's not as if he didn't teach me how to use that gun for no reason!" I cringed slightly at this comment. "What business do you have on our Vati's farm?"

"We were told to come here…" Ludwig whimpered, hiding further behind me and tugging my shirt.

Vash's face softened as he looked at Ludwig- who was ready to ball his eyes out as he had done twice since we left our house-, but went back to frowning as he looked back up to me. "Who told you? You'd better not be here trying to look innocent so you can break in! Especially not steal our funds that Vati worked damn hard for!"

"Mein Gott, do you-?!"

"Vash, it's good to see you're trying to protect the farm from intruders, but these two are friends." I was surprised to recognise Ervino when I first saw him. He worked with opa as the banker for his business before quitting, and from I got out of Vash over time, I think it was because his mother, Gretel had passed away giving birth to Lili, another reason she and Ludwig got close. "You don't need to be so harsh, they _are _only children, like you, and I'd like to know where you got that language from, because _I_ certainly didn't teach you it."

Vash blushed hard with embarrassment while Lili came up to us, trying to coax Ludwig out from behind my back. Somehow she did, and she took him over to their goat, letting him pet it awkwardly.

While Ludwig and Lili made friends, Ervino brought Vash and me into the farmhouse. He got us to sit at the table, grabbing something from one of the kitchen cupboards, as well as two mugs.

"See this, Gilbert? This is the best chocolate sold in Switzerland; the only thing we spend more money than we probably need to on. Lili and Vash are allowed one block a day of this, and so are you and Ludwig. I'll make you both some hot chocolate while you savour it. It'll be the nicest chocolate you have ever tasted, I can bet my hand on that."

Ervino never forced us onto the topic of that nights events- he only ever talked about it if WE wanted to. I'd never tried Swiss Chocolate until that day, but he was wrong. Chocolate made with the finest ingredients of Germany easily topped the handy work of the Swiss and the Belgians.

Vash took a while to warm up to us, but he was probably nice to me only on Christmas and any days that were connected to the incident. One year he had managed to crochet or cross-stich (whatever) the Prussian flag for mein awesome self, so I had to give it to him- sometimes anyway- even though he just shoved it in my chest and didn't even acknowledge my thanks.

After all, people always thought that I was rude, untidy and a pervert. I was irritable, ja, but none of those three.

We only spent a couple of weeks in the Zwingli household, it was the day after my seventh birthday when we were moved. Ervino had told the Police that he had found us, but he had been given custody of us while they found an adoptive parent or parents for us.

We were eventually adopted off to a woman called Mrs Downham (we never got to learn her name until six years later). She just had the two of us in her flat for five months, until a certain Francis Bonnefoy came along.

Francis was probably the calmest out of he, Antonio and I in the end, but he was in complete hysterics when he was brought to Mrs Downham's house. All he did for the first night was scream and kick his Social Worker and even ran off for six hours, and had managed to make it a good three or so miles away. His Social Worker, Laura, had to pick him up and carry him and unfortunately for her, his arms were long enough to hold the sides of the doorframes so that he could stop her.

He had calmed down a bit when he saw Ludwig and me, but cried himself to sleep for about a year or so. Since there was four bedrooms in her flat, one was hers, one was a guest room, one mine and one Ludwig's, and Mrs Downham had trialled putting me and Francis in the same room, which was fine. Though we never usually got much sleep since we'd either talk late into the night, or we'd have a nightmare, wet ourselves and then wake the other up when we were attempting to change the sheets. Other than that, Francis and I got on like a house on fire.

Antonio came along two years later, and was completely different to Francis' entrance. He instead was frowning and we all thought he was quite rude as he refused to speak and just pointed. Anything that doesn't seem to be like Antonio was Antonio until we were probably nine or ten.

While Antonio went out to do something about the same time, Francis and I managed to get hold of Mrs Downham's computer to see exactly what the matter was with the Spaniard. We found out it was 'selective mutism', as he eventually did start speaking, but very rarely. It was out of choice rather than because he was born with it or something.

He sort of snapped the first time he saw Lovino Vargas- Francis' cousin. Vargas was our age and had a brother the same age as Ludwig and Lili called Feliciano, but since the elder Italian was a lot quieter and preferred to be by himself, he was more prone to being a target for bullies- for being rich and going to _Grange, _as well as the rumours of what happened to his parents being spread around.

Francis, Antonio and I had gone to the park to just muck around as we usually did when we were bored to see several boys from our school surrounding someone. We pretended we were paying no notice and climbed one of the jungle gym things so we could get a better look of who it was. When we saw the curl and heard "F-Fuck off, bastards!" Francis and I knew exactly who it was.

Antonio had stayed on the floor, frowning but jumped slightly when Francis yelled. "Hey, leave my cousin alone!"

Even though Francis was quite weak and he always said threats but never went through with them, after one of them kicked Lovino in the shin, they left.

Francis rushed over to Lovino as quick as he could while I made sure that they weren't going to come back and ambush all four of us. Antonio was still frowning where he had been the whole time, until Lovino looked at him and he looked back.

Suddenly he rushed up to the Italian, hugging him once he got up and wouldn't stop talking even to breath.

"Bastard, I don't even know who you are…"

"I'm so sorry I should have tried to do something but I didn't next time those bullies come along I'll make sure that they never try to hurt you again and if they do try then I'll make sure that they won't live another day!"

We were all confused what was going on, but when Antonio went from the silent, frowning Spaniard to the one we know today, we were sure something had to have happened between him and Lovino that the Italian couldn't remember. We never asked what.

~x~

Mrs Downham died of a heart attack when I was twelve.

She had a quiet funeral despite being quite a well-known woman, especially since Antonio changed and a few weeks after we formed the 'Bad Touch Trio', the most awesome group in existence. The three of us were given a choice (Ludwig's choice would be the same as mine); we could either be adopted again (we all said no way in hell to this), or we could stay in the flat since it was pretty secure and safe and the people living in the four flats downstairs (owned by five different young adults from different parts of Nordic Europe) would report our behaviour every month or so. We all opted for the second choice.

Ludwig and I were taken to a special school for the mentally traumatised from the January after the incident. I don't know why Antonio and Francis didn't come as well, but they were allowed to go to a normal school.

And now, seven years after, we're finally allowed to go the normal school ourselves.

It wasn't that I was scared of meeting new people or anything; I knew most of the people who attended Grange because nearly everyone lived on one estate. I don't know what I was scared of…I was just scared about something.

~x~

Matthew POV

"Come on Alfred. We've just had six weeks to sleep in, and Mom made sure we went to bed early so we weren't tired.

"No. Still tired." He muttered, rolling over and near enough asleep by the time he had got comfy again. I wish I had the ability to do that sometimes, I ended up staying awake for hours on end before I could finally drift off, and then I usually awoke half an hour or so later.

I prodded him hard in the back, trying to dig my nails in for emphasis. "Alfred, it's the first day of school. Remember last year when you pulled the same stunt and got an after school detention and weren't allowed your timetable so you had to follow me and ask the teachers if you were meant to be in the same class as I was?"

"I really can't be asked to get out of bed. My beds all comfy and I'm all wrapped up and warm~"

I groaned in annoyance. "Just get out right now. I don't want to go either, but look; I've already had a shower and I'm about to get dressed. I'll send Arthur in."

"Eww, Mattie is naked." Then he heard the second part and was immediately awake. Six days ago, Alfred and I had gone to see Arthur, our cousin, since we hadn't heard from him or our Aunt Alice for five or six years at least. But we ended up finding out that in the time we had no contact, Aunt Alice had been heavily abusing him. We'd told Dad and she was now serving ten years for Child Abuse and Arthur was staying with us.

Let's just say, Arthur really didn't like anything apart from things he, well, liked. And Alfred Frederick Jones was the sort of person who pissed him off to the hills.

I got myself dressed, watching Alfred rush around trying to find all his school uniform he had thrown somewhere at least three weeks ago. I wasn't so open about my naked body because I didn't want anyone to see the cuts I had given myself while I was 'supposedly' on the toilet and because Arthur was homophobic, but Dad was at work and Mom and Alfred weren't paying attention to any of us, so I managed to quickly slip my towel off and get changed before Alfred noticed any of the bandages.

I'd gone a bit too far with the cutting yesterday, so I had to keep the bandage on as secure as I possibly could. The blade had looked like a murdered has used it. I made sure that none of the events from the last escapade were visible, but I'd mastered how to do so during the summer. I had a legit reason for some of the scars too- I cut myself about two weeks ago with my ice hockey blade so there was a deep scar from that. The only problem was how obvious the bandages were…

Mom, Alfred, Arthur and I had breakfast once the two of us were sorted out and we were ready to leave once we'd brushed our teeth, et cetera, et cetera. The normal school walk happened with the addition of Arthur. I sped up at a quicker rate once we got onto the main road leading up to the school; I heard Arthur question Alfred 'what the bloody hell was I doing' but I was out of earshot by the time Alfred must have answer.

"Hey, Williams, fancy playing a game with me? I know you want to~"

I felt Sadik grab me by the front of the collar, misshaping it before the school year officially even started. It was a threat rather than the height barrier, because again I was taller than him. I gulped slightly without saying anything. I hated the fact I naturally showed submission.

"I'm sure that you're wondering what sort of game I'm thinking of, brat. It's something that might actually man you up." I didn't realise Carlos was also early into school for once until I heard him snicker from behind the Turk. Why can't he just understand I'm not Alfred and we can go back to being good friends like we used to?

Sadik dragged me all the way to the cleaning cupboard and shoved me into it. Since only the cleaner used it once everybody had left, nobody really paid any attention to it. He turned the dim light on and started toying with my shirt slightly. Out of every assault he had given me since I had come out with my sexuality, I had never wanted this to be sexual assault.

What confused me the most was, if he wasn't accepting of the homosexual, why was he attempting to rape a guy? It just didn't add up.

"Bet you're enjoying this, a man touching you, you slut." He said, pulling my jumper off, the polo shirt quickly following. "Wait, how the fuck do you have a six-pack when you're so gay that a blind fucking cow can see it?"

He started poking it, and I started unintentionally whimpering in submission. Though I wasn't so bothered about exposing the area's I didn't cut that much, I hated when I was touched, whether it was someone like Mom or Alfred or Sadik himself. Mom or someone hugging me- fine, but Sadik poking me? No way.

When I heard my zipped go down, I would have rather just kept the poking.

"I bet your cocks so small I can't even see it. Perhaps a vagina's there instead, and you're actually a lesbian pretending to be in Grange so your big brother Alfie can protect you from all this bullying. Aw, how sweet."

_Don't go near me, you Turkish bastard. Maple, I swore…_

He started to attempt to make it more sexual, and as a natural reaction. I slapped him in the face. Hard.

Sadik's retaliated and his hand went straight for the bruise already starting to form. This was my chance.

I quickly grabbed my shirt and pulled it on as quick as I could, ignoring Sadik and his incoherent swearing. I ran for it. With the situation I currently was in, what else should I do?

As I tried to get as far away as I possibly could from that…monster…I ended up finding that I was on the other side of the school building than what I should be. Since it was now registration, I would probably be the one getting the after school detention- not Alfred.

I ended up finding myself next to the Female Sports Teachers Changing Room. Now just because I'm gay doesn't mean I want to go in there and see them walking around in just their bras and pants, I'm not a pervert! And most of them look, how do I put this…the wrong build for Physical Education as it is.

I slowly walked around to my form room, which was in Science. Since it was the first day, I didn't have my timetable and I wasn't going to go through the embarrassment Alfred did last year, so I needed to get mine. I made sure I wasn't messed up first before I was about to enter the Science Department.

The door was in sight, so I sped up so I wouldn't be so late. Unfortunately I was too focused on the door to notice that I had smacked into something hard and fell backwards until I felt the dizziness.

I looked up at what I had walked into, more like _who_. I thought it might have been one of the rebellious fifteen year olds in the school who had walked out of class to go and light a cigarette since they were craving the nicotine, but I was wrong.

It was Gilbert Beilschmidt for God's sake. Gilbert, the boy who I had been fascinated in since I had heard his story on the news, and I had just walked into him.

"Running isn't awesome you know. Better slow down before you run into someone who you'll regret running into."

_His German Accent, God._

He stuck his pale arm out for me to grab, and when I slowly grabbed it, he yanked me up. His red eyes met my violet ones as he grinned, raising his eyebrow to move some of his almost white hair out of the way.

_He is much more handsome in real life than the pictures Dad had shown me…_

"T-Thanks…" I muttered, about to carry on walking to the classroom before I Gilbert grabbed my wrist tighter and I fell backwards.

"C'mon Birdie, you've missed enough of this Period anyway, I'll just tell the teacher you were showing me around. Skiving is awesome anyway. I want to know why you look so distressed and why such a nerdy looking kid isn't in his class."

"Gilbert, I don't want-"

"Wait, how do you know my name? I haven't told you it."

"M-My father was one of the Policemen who went to the Zwingli household to find you and he was the man interviewed over the case. I've gained an interest in some of the cases and your case was one of them."

"Oh, so you think I'm awesome enough to be interested in?" He winked.

"What?! Oh, maple…"

"I'm only messing with you." He smirked again, using his hand to push back his hair this time. "You know my problems, surely it isn't bad enough for me to know yours?"

"Urm…"

"I'm not trying to make you feel unawesome, I'm doing anything but that, but just tell me. I don't know you and you might be the first friend I have via the school.

"M-maple." I whispered, before going through everything that was the matter at the moment. Bar the self-harming, he didn't need to know that part. I watched his eyes more than anything else the whole time; staring into his red orbs was addicting. He seemed intent on knowing everything and getting every single word out, so there was no point in leaving anything bar the most personal details out. He could probably read my thoughts anyway, I didn't hide them.

"Look, Birdie. I don't know you and you don't know me _physically _but that is just sick. Why didn't you tell anyone?" I'd heard of Dad he had a trait of his voice going higher when he was happy and it lowered when he was serious and it was one of the lowest voices I'd ever heard off someone before.

"I don't know…I'm just scared, eh."

"You shouldn't be scared, Birdie. I don't know Carlos but I know Sadik and I promise to beat the shit out of him when I next see him and teach Carlos that there is actually quite a few differences between the two of you since I saw Alfred earlier. Nobody, and I mean, nobody, is going to hurt Birdie when the awesomeness known as Gilbert Amery Beilschmidt is around!"

"G-Gil- Can I call you that?-, we've only known each other physically for five minutes or so, and now you're acting like you've been my best-"

"Look Birdie, if someone is beating the crap out of you, then of course I'm going to make it my business to help you out, like your Vater did for me. Just because my childhood was shit doesn't mean yours should be. And ja, feel free to call me whatever as long as it isn't racist or mocks mein awesome albinism."

"…How did you feel?"

"What?"

"I know this sounds like a stupid question, but how did you feel? When the incident happened. I know I can probably guess, but now that I know you in real life and not just from pictures and texts, I want to know."

Gil's face twitched slightly, before softening. "I was scared and I didn't know what to do. I had to act like and adult when I was just six years old and all I had was a man named Daniel Hérdévary help me jump from a second story windowpane and then tell me where the Zwingli's lived. Mein Gott, now I want to meet him again so I can thank him, and it'd be nice to see Elizabeta too…"

I didn't ask anything about Daniel and Elizabeta.

"Hey, Birdie, if you want, then you could always come around to mein place sometime, that'll be awesome. I'll tell you next time Franny and Toni are out- if didn't know I live with them- and mein bruder will probably just lock himself in his room, it's not as if he cares about what I do anyway."

"Umm, Gil?"

"Ja, Birdie?"

"I didn't really want to go into Registration other than to get my mark and my timetable, and I don't know what we have next…

He grabbed his timetable out his bag. "Well, I have…fucks sake. Why can't this school teach German instead of French? It's so much more awesome."

"I don't mind French since my Mom is Quebecois and taught me it at a young age…"

"Does that mean you'll do my homework for me if I do your homework for another subject I'm good at?"

"What are you good at first?"

"Geography…somehow Maths…Food Technology if it doesn't involve an oven…and Chemistry."

"French for Chemistry?"

"Deal!" He grinned, shaking my hand.

I finally managed to get my timetable and had all my lessons with Gil that day, and since Sadik also hated Heracles, the Greek student, we'd become friends and he had managed to find out that we didn't have any lessons together until Thursday. Good.

We had French, Maths, Geography and English that day. First lesson was missed to give time for the new students to get adapted to Grange. Hopefully the teachers warned them it was hell and not to admit they were homosexual.

French was boring since I already mastered the language. Mom tried teaching the both of us, I was eager to learn and caught on well, and Alfred couldn't learn it and didn't really want to either. I had decided to watch Gilbert in every lesson that we had and it didn't seem he even was _attempting _to learn anything. The only thing Francis did related to the lesson was yell 'araignée' when he saw a spider on the window.

I was sat next to Gilbert in Maths since my teacher had heard of my interest for the Gilbert and Ludwig Beilschmidt case and he also thought me to be one of the most…appropriate students to look after a student with such traumatisation's as Gilbert. We were given a questionnaire off Ivan that would help decide if we needed to see him this year but those who already saw him didn't get one. I watched as Gilbert ripped his, put it in the bin next to him, folded his arms and I think he went to sleep for a good twenty minutes.

Geography was a test on our knowledge of European countries, capitals and rivers. I got 29 out of 42, which Sir said was a good attempt since Alfred only got seven.

"Dude! I'm from North America! Give me a test on that, ditching the Caribbean, I'll get 100%, guaranteed!"

Sir groaned before describing a project that we were to be set up with a partner which would happen out of school. Unfortunately for all us, he was picking the partners and since he wanted us to be with 'people we don't know so well' he usually pairs us with the bullies we are trying to avoid. I _should _be fine with anyone other than Carlos and Sadik, everyone else seems fine with homosexuals.

Hopefully I'd be OK?


	4. Chapter 4

**My Computer caught a Virus so I've only just got it back without having one for two weeks.**

Gilbert had probably made me smile more in a school day than I had in the whole of last school year.

He had followed me the whole time and insisted he sat next to me in every lesson (luckily since the teachers I had today liked me they let that happen). He even let me hang around with the locally infamous Bad Touch Trio, which even I had heard of but had never been introduced to the three at once.

Antonio was nice as well, but left pretty quickly to go and sit with Lovino Vargas, who was on his own. Despite his foul language most of the time, he was a nice person to be with if he liked you.

Gilbert already knew Arthur as he did go to a normal school (this being the one by ours Arthur originally went to before his part of the family broke away from us), and asked a little bit about him for a while, but ended that conversation quickly when said Brit came into the room with Alfred. I wasn't making assumptions, but Francis had seemed to take an interest in my cousin.

"Hey Fanny, they're starting the auditions for the school production next month. I would give you good money if you audition for the Princess."

"Ah, non. My beauty would scare the others too much and I'd automatically get the part, there would be no audition." Francis winked as Gilbert, currently drinking, tried as hard as he could not to spit his drink out. Unfortunately, he failed, and the best part was it went over Sadik of all people.

His uniform was dripping and he sent an accusing look at our table, especially when he saw me there too.

"Bastards!" He yelled at us, not caring that there was a teacher probably about five metres away on duty. She pricked her ears but didn't caring. Swearing was most of the student's first language. No, I'm not joking.

Heracles, on the next table along from us with Kiku, Arthur and Alfred snorted so Sadik then decided that he'd rather annoy his Greek enemy than me.

Alfred gave me a look when he was who I was with but didn't do anything else. And to be honest, without him there the whole time and yet still having the protection was nice.

When school ended we had a bit of a problem as Arthur had disappeared but when he returned home three quarters of an hour later, we were fine even though he told us about nothing and he now had a graze on his cheek. He was pretty independent and it looked as if he might have just fallen off of his bike or something like that.

Alfred and I had always shared a room due to the fact we got on really well bar the odd argument (who doesn't argue anyway?). I did some homework we had been given on the first day- sigh- before going up to see him lounging on my bed eating a bag of crisps (or chips, as he usually called them), and was getting them everywhere.

"Um, Alfred? Would you mind at least eating a little neater? I don't mind you being on my bed but I just don't want the mess everywhere…"

"You love it when I leave a mess on your bed bro, admit it." He said, obviously having finished the packet and threw it on the floor. "Say, I wondered where you had gone, I didn't expect to see you with Francis, Antonio and the new kid."

"Do you know who the new kid is?" I asked.

"Nope, I don't really care who they are bar they are albino, which is wicked. Also, albinos are usually murderers, pre-warning."

"It's Gilbert Beilschmidt. You know, the elder of the Beilschmidt brothers in that case that I'm interested about."

"Nice. Just make sure that…how do I put this…that since he's been in a special school for the mentally unstable that he doesn't suddenly snap and then hurt you."

"He won't Alfred. If you remember he came to our Infant school with us for a brief period but you probably don't remember him as he had a wig, colour contacts and another identity. He just wanted to come to a normal school the whole time and would still be there if he hadn't literally begged to come here."

Alfred grabbed his bottle of Coca Cola before taking a swig and burping before answering. "Our family, like, has a magnet for psycho's, remember? What happened to Arthur's parents and if you _are _going to be around Francis, Antonio, Gilbert and Lovino, look what happened to their parents. They're all either dead or in prison!"

"It's not their fault that it happened. Anyway, you hang around with Kiku and Arthur and Heracles and they all have problems."

"…Alright, but if they do anything to you, you get right here and tell me, bro promise?"

"Yes, bro promise." I sighed. "You don't have to be so overprotective of me, you know, I am the younger twin but that doesn't mean I'm completely dependable of you."

"Mattie, you know it's just natural because you're quieter and I'm naturally protective."

"How is me being quieter a reason?" I asked calmly as I sat on his bed.

"I don't know but it's the first thing that came into my head." He shrugged, before looking at Arthur who was just about to go into his bedroom. "Hey, Artie, come hang round with me and Mattie!"

Arthur sighed, before standing in the doorframe, cream now on the graze on his cheek. "What do you want? And my names Arthur, not Artie."

"I wanted to hang around with my buddy Artie- oh look, I said it again-, come on, we haven't seen you properly for over half a decade and remember how much fun we used to have?"

"So much fun we usually had one of us ending up in hospital, usually you." Arthur pointed out. "Remember when you blinded yourself in one eye from running into that ruler hanging off the table at school so you had to wear glasses permanently?"

"Of course I remember! You laughed as well, you meanie pants."

The two of them talked for several hours and neither noticed I'd left the room long before until I called them for dinner.

~CHANGE OF POV FROM MATTHEW TO GILBERT~

One of the nights that scared me the most after the Beilschmidt case was closed was the _night _it was closed.

Ludwig was the sort of child most people could only dream for; quiet, obedient, shy, adorable. Sure, he cried when he was a baby, but other than that he never did unless he had thrown up in the night since he was quite a sickly child.

However, on that first night he was literally screaming his lungs out so much that I had really sore eardrums from trying to calm him down. Both Mrs. Downham and I had tried, but failed to do so.

While she tried calling the Police and hotlines for Traumatised Children, I tried anything I could do as a six year old to try and calm him down. I never even got the reason for his tears, and I still haven't.

In the end it wasn't either of us, nor the police, nor the hotline who managed to soothe him. It was in fact Tino and Matthias from the floor below. Both must have been around thirteen or fourteen at that time, and while Tino calmed down Ludwig surprisingly quickly, Matthias gave me the best sort of thing he could give to a child in the form of a 'pep talk' which sort of helped the next time that he started crying (which was the next night).

Now though, Tino and Ludwig never spoke bar if they saw each other (and ever since he started dating his now lodger Berwald, he ignored him even more. Matthias and I were still bro's though, and since he was unemployed with just a load of video games that he, Berwald and Lukas had when they were teenagers, he usually just let me come around for a few hours to muck around with him on those. Bar his sometimes terrible sense of humour, he was pretty awesome to hang around with. When Francis and Antonio were either out or in a bad mood (Francis was usually the latter now Antonio had warmed up), he was a break from them.

"Hey," He said, stealing the bowl of _Walkers _Ready Salted from me, before cooing. "Enjoy your first day with all the big boys?"

"Fuck off; you know that I know most of them anyway because they live on this estate. And give back those crisps; _I _brought them so _I'm _eating them." I said, grabbing the bowl back.

"I share my video games and I usually share my food with you, so payback." He said, grabbing the bowl back off.

"Nein." The two of us ended up grabbing the bowl back and forth until the crisps went flying everywhere. Since he had left his door open, Hanatamago- Berwald and Tino's dog- came in and attempted to eat them before Matthias picked her up and took her back to her owner's apartment.

Once he came back, he flopped himself on the sofa, loading up some sort of racing game. "Hey, I'm actually wondering about how you did at school. I just felt like teasing you in the process."

"Meet anyone new who's rich enough to not live on this estate but not rich enough to go to snob school?"

"Ja, I did actually. Name's Matthew Williams and he's French-Canadian and pretty awesome."

"N'aw, Gilbert made a friend!" He said, hitting my shoulder before he somehow got hit in the face. "Hey, I tried to make a friend with someone I didn't know on my first day and I near enough got stabbed by them!"

"Or they wanted to see what would happen to your hair if they cut some off." I muttered into my hand, snorting.

"Rude, very rude." Matthias turned on the video game then and we didn't really speak bar whines and gloats, or the other cheated. I went home about two hours later to find Francis moping (he was supposed to cook tonight but the awesomely kind me offered to do it instead) and Ludwig had his door shut. I know he was having his hitting puberty weird behaviour thing yada yada, but he was acting a bit _too _weird, even for puberty.

Antonio had came back just as I'd finished cooking and as I'd only cooked for three I just shoved a Microwave Meal in his face and made him eat that, despite his complaints the middle was cold. He went to bed pretty early, as did Francis.

Ludwig wasn't in his room now; he was at the dining room table tapping away at the shared laptop. He sometimes did some creative writing at times, but this wasn't it.

Ludwig's creative writing scared me a little. He usually deleted it in frustration without saving, but he accidentally saved one which I automatically read. I know that he must be curious, but it was all sorts of theories on how he and I ended up where we are now, and why he remembers nothing of his childhood bar a pistol being shot. I know it couldn't have been from going to the local Shooting Club with the Zwingli's; they always used rifles. Well, Vash and Ervino did, Lili just watched or as she got a little older- painted.

I didn't say anything, because he was pretty much dead on if you took pieces out of the seventeen he had eventually written and put them together.

I know Ludwig defied the stereotype blonds were stupid (as did I with albinos are murderers), but I didn't think he'd figure it out for himself; I'd thought he'd have asked me or Ervino if he remembered why exactly we stayed with them, or if he remembered staying with them at all.

Come to think of it, I swear Vash mentioning something about Ervino wanting to see me and Ludwig again sometime, when he actually spoke to us. I didn't mind seeing the Zwingli's; it was just because they had a tight schedule and Lili and Vash went to boarding school.

I heard Ludwig sigh and shift in his room while I was thinking, so my attention directed to him.

I honestly didn't know what to do, but I decided to go with the idea that would probably be better for me on long term, as well as Ludwig.

That was the night I told him everything I could remember, and even showed him something that I hadn't show n anyone before- A picture that was in opa's bedroom I pulled out of the frame and folded it in my pocket while we went to find the Zwingli's.

~POV CHANGE FROM MATTHEW TO GILBERT~

I spent after dinner texting and eventually calling Francis, since it seemed he needed it and he also needed to contact my dad, but since he was out he asked me to pass on the message.

"_I hardly caught Ludwig's face when he passed my room but since he's naturally stoic it's hard to tell anyway. He seemed the same when he was talking, but both of their voices broke at one point or another. Also, I couldn't really hear what they were actually saying, but I could just hear how their voices sounded." _

"I'm sure that's already plenty of enough information Francis. I was just wondering…was my dad involved in your case as well?"

"_Let me think…you said that he looked like Alfred without the cowlick, right?"_

"Oui."

"…_He was then. Not in charge of the case, but I remember him holding me and comforting with me. Does he get put on the cases with kids because he's had you two?"_

"Some. He wasn't on that one with that fire that killed a child and his parents, leaving the other two of their children orphans until they were more on the support part of it than the actual arson. I'm not completely sure, but I think they might have been Abel and Bella at school."

"_I find it a coincidence that near enough everyone who goes to Grange has been connected with your father. How do I put this…that we are the victims and you and Alfred are the supporters, if you get what I mean?"_

"I don't think so really- the schools just in a rough area."

"_That is a valid point, but what about the fact that most people lived elsewhere before but had to move to this area as a result?"_

"Who knows?" I said, giggling softly, before Alfred lazily yelled who I was talking to across from Arthur's room. They didn't hate each other; they were more like frenemies than anything. "I'm going to have to go; otherwise Alfred will harass me for the rest of the night."

"_I understand, Antonio has just returned too and he wants to speak to me. Au revior."_

"Au revior." I said softly as I hung the phone up.

~x~

Why did I not suspect this to happen?

Alfred had already caught the 'back-to-school bug' and didn't go into school and Arthur was complaining about his grazes so I had to go into school myself.

Gilbert wasn't in either, and I suspected Ludwig wasn't when Feliciano came and wrapped Lovino's arm around him. The elder Italian rolled his eyes but just went with it; Feliciano didn't look in the best of moods himself anyway.

I'm not saying that Francis, Antonio and Lovino were bad friends (excuse the pun about Antonio, Francis and Gilbert who used to be the 'Bad Friends Trio' but eventually changed Friends to Touch), but they didn't send a text if they couldn't see me like Alfred did every so often and Gilbert did _three times _yesterday. So I guess I shouldn't have been that surprised that Sadik (Carlos was ill too) used this as an excuse to try and break every bone in my body.

The pain had become numb over time, but a kick that I swore must have broke one of my right ribs from Sadik really throbbed and I wailed in agony.

Out of everything that Sadik could have done to keep me quiet, shoving one of his P.E. socks down my throat wasn't the sort of thing I expected.

It hurt much more than you probably think it would. First I was permanently gagging since and I just wanted to vomit to stop the feeling, and the material was scratching the sides of my mouth. And the worst part? That this _thing_ that was invading my mouth had been on Sadik's foot. Minus all the other things, that was the thing that made me want to puke all over him. It was his tough luck if I did, he's given me enough pain so it's just a teensy weensy bit of payback. That word sounded so good right now.

He left once I nearly stopped breathing, not even caring about his sock. He probably didn't want it since it had touch a _homosexual _of all people. It wasn't my fault I was born to prefer my own gender than the opposite one, was it? Bar things such as sexual organs, puberty and stereotyping, there wasn't much difference between genders when you thought about it, why was France literally one of the only countries that didn't frown upon it? They legalised anal sex in 1796 for crying out loud!

I had Maths next lesson, but after popping into talk to my teacher, I went straight to Ivan. After talking to Toris, he opened the door with open arms (literally) and demanded for a hug which crushed my bones even more before letting me in, making the slowly disappearing pain come back almost twice as bad. I winced.

"It's nice to see you Matvey, but I didn't really want to meet you in this room, I'd much rather had seen you in a shop out of school or on the playground. Now who do I have to use my magical pipe of pain on this time for hurting such a sweet little Canadian like you?"

"No-one." I lied, sighing. I watched Ivan raise his eyebrow, and I knew he knew I was lying. "Well, someone but you don't need to know who!"

Ivan sighed. "Matvey, I know I'm supposed to help you, but I can't without names. I don't mind you keeping it to yourself, but I can't do anything to help if you do."

"I know." I said, wincing suddenly as another lot of pain came from my ribs. Mon Dieu, I'd broken several ribs in Ice Hockey in one go and it didn't hurt as much as this did! Maple, Ivan saw…

"Matvey, I am taking you to the hospital."

"Non, I don't need to…"

"You do. I know a broken bone when I've seen one; I did it enough when I played Ice Hockey when I was younger."

I was going to go anyway after that second persuasion, but now I know he used to play Hockey, I _really _liked him other than just as a councillor.

~x~

Alfred's face was a picture when he saw me come home in Ivan's seven-seater about two hours later.

"Why were you in the car with the Commie Councillor?" He asked, before going into a fit of coughing. "Ahem, and why you early bro, school doesn't finish for another two hours."

"Oh!" I said, trying to hold the fact I was about to lie back. "Ivan took me out of lessons to help him with renovating his room since Toris and Eduard were missing enough lessons already. He accidentally dropped the desk on my foot and I fell back and hit the bookcase. It hurt my foot and head but broke one of my ribs as well when something heavy on top of the bookcase fell on it." Mom always told me I was a good storyteller.

"Ow, bro, that sounds painful." Alfred was also gullible, another advantage. "You told Mom?"

"How could I when she's out?" I questioned, raising an eyebrow.

"I dunno…she did say she thought this was a twenty four hour cold more than anything so I'll be back in school tomorrow hopefully."

"When have you _hopefully_ wanted to be back in school?" I sighed.

Alfred grinned. "I got some lessons with decent people sat next to me tomorrow, it'll be hilarious. And we have Soccer fourth lesson, it's going to be rad."

"For you anyway." I rolled my eyes. "Is Arthur going to be in tomorrow?"

"To be honest with you, he was just skiving today really. I don't know what happened, but I don't think he wanted to see someone or something like that."

"Do you know what happened?"

"I think he was confronted. Don't ask me anything else, I'm guessing that."

Arthur, who I could hear was upstairs moving around was cussing his head off. I understood he would seem a little withdrawn from the family for a while, but this was worse than I originally thought.

Mom eventually came home and completely freaked out over my rib, which had actually stopped hurting when I wasn't thinking about it. She then decided to take me to hospital AGAIN but we were sent home as soon as we got there.

The pain eventually came back though and it had to be when I was about to go to sleep of all times. So I'd probably be more prone to pain tomorrow as I was sensitive already and also going to be exhausted as Alfred's snoring wasn't helping.

It's a tough life being Matthew Pierre Williams sometimes. It really is.


End file.
